If I had to describe Cariño's family in one word, it would be tough. Ever since my first day in Los Vasquez I have been intimidated by this family. All four of his older brothers strut down the dirt road, shirtless, winking at me and/or blowing me kisses. My first month here, I played game after game of Dominoes with these boys while they laughed, made fun of my Spanish and God only knows what else they said. I tried earning their respect by beating them in Dominoes only to find out that they would always win but after re-checking the score a few times, it was only because the points didn't seem to add up correctly. I have played a Dominican card game, Casino, with their father to find out that he too, would cheat. How do I tell a 70 year old man that I know he is cheating? I didn't, I played stupid. After four months, I finally figured out who all was part of this family.
They are a family of 9, Six boys and one girl. Their father is a bit older, their mother is younger and their primary source of income is agriculture. I have witnessed the only girl in the family get into two fights, both defending her rambunctious, sometimes hard to handle, nephew, Rafeline, who also lives with them (Rafeline's father does not live in Los Vasquez but he has lived here all his life, with his grandparents). There is also a two year old living with them along with his mother, the fiance of one of the young boys and she is 6 months pregnant. The only daughter's fiance also frequently stays in their house when he is not working at an all inclusive resort a few hours away. They have 13 people staying in a 3 bedroom home, they all share beds which is common for people to do in the Dominican Republic.
As you know, after my first three months in Los Vasquez, I moved into my own house. I started seeing more of Cariño (usually with a friend or two in tow). He would come over and just sit and laugh at/with me. We became friends especially when I mentioned that I wanted to buy a horse. Cariño is the boy that helped me find and buy my horse and he now helps me take care of it, doing most of the dirty work. He is 16 years old and still attends the local elementary school in Los Vasquez. He has proven to me that he is responsible by taking Señor Eduardo (my horse) to feed in his land three times per week. He has ridden Eduardo with me and walked alongside me as I have ridden him solo talking me through what to do. He has brought me lists of items to pick up at the vet when I leave the community in order to clear up his parasites or to clean out his ears. Cariño now comes over everyday to hang out, listen to music or just to talk.
Cariño is a natural leader. He has a small group of friends that follow him around. He can be a smart alack sometimes, but what 16 year old boy isn't? He teases the girls in the community & I have had to kick him out of a meeting or two for flicking people's ears while they are reading or throwing balls of paper at other kids. He loves animals and you will always find him on a horse or with a dog running behind him. Cariño reminds me a little of myself.
Over the past month, I have been asking Cariño when and if he was going to come over to study. He explains to me that he does not like school, he can't pass 7th grade and he will probably just cheat on his exams. Over the course of the month, we have had numerous discussions and I have explained to him that most kids his age don't like school and I understand that it can be boring, but it is very important. He would blow me off whenever I mentioned studying for his exams saying he would come by later just to get me off his back. This past week the local elementary school had their final exams.
Last Monday, Cariño came by after his first exam, Science, and he told me he failed. Once again, I told him to come over and we could study for Tuesday's exam, Spanish. He comes over, after his exam on Tuesday to tell me he failed. Later in the day, Cariño sees me working on Math with a younger girl, in Sixth grade. I tell him to come by later and we can work on Math and he says ok and sits and watches me help her. He never comes by. On Wednesday, after his final, he comes over and when I ask him why he didn't come over to study, he tells me he did but I wasn't there. Liar. Later in the evening, in walks Cariño, no shoes, his shirt tied around his head, his pants sliding off his skinny body and smelling of rum. I shake my head and lecture him, "Listen Cariño, I know you can pass these. If you do, you will be able to move onto Eight grade, you don't want to redo seventh grade for a third time, do you?"He just looks at me with his glossy eyes and I tell him to go home. Thursday afternoon, Cariño is at my doorstep with his notebook, a broken pencil and his stack of exams that he had not passed. He will be given another chance to retake all of them on Friday.
As I am going through the exams, I ask Cariño for his notes so we can fill the tests out correctly. He doesn't have any. We spend the next two hours going through each exam and googling the answers - What is a verb? What is a pronoun? When was the Dominican Republic founded? What is an earthquake? We get all of the answers and I tell him it is up to him to study and memorize these, I cannot help.
We move onto Math. I look at his old exam, 40%. It is a 20 question test, 5 true and false, 5 problems on less than, greater than or equal to, 5 problems on whether a given number was positive or negative and 5 math problems, 3 multiplication and 2 division. While looking at his test, I see that he needs the most help on >,< and = and the multiplication and division problems. I look a little closer and notice that a few of the problems were incorrectly marked by the teacher. I question him on who corrected it and he told me his Math teacher did. This is what I see; -1000>900, -300>200, 90<100, 50=50 and -20=20. I was stunned. I tried calling a few other volunteers and couldn't get ahold of anyone. I then call a friend in the states (thanks Teri!) to make sure I am not losing my mind and she confirms that I am not. I then try to explain to Cariño that some of these answers are incorrect. He has a tough time wrapping his head around this and tells me, no, the teacher said it is wrong, it is wrong. I explain to him that if I have $0 but I owe my neighbor $1,000, I have $-1,000. If he has $900, who has more money? He understands but continues to tell me that it is wrong because the teacher said so. After ten minutes of explaining/arguing, I tell him to forget about it but make sure to bring me his test when he gets it back.
We move onto multiplication and division. After working with a few other students, I have come to realize that they were not taught how to multiply correctly. They were all missing a few MAJOR steps to multiplying. I start from scratch with Cariño and tell him to be very careful because one little mistake will give him an incorrect answer. I watch him struggle through simple multiplication tables, doing them in his head, guessing random numbers but too ashamed to write them down. We use Dominoes and count. We move on to harder problems. After working through many problems together, I let him try on his own. I correct his Math problems and they were all correct. I see him hiding a smile, he says thank you, we give each other a fist bump and I tell him I know he is going to do great.
Cariño passed all of his exams. He turns 17 in two days and will be able to start Eighth grade next year.
In Spanish, the word Cariño is often used as a term of endearment such "honey" or "sweetheart".
The Education System in the Dominican Republic is of great concern. The government is spending less than 4% on education and the Dominican Republic has one of the highest illiteracy rates in all of South/Central America. It is common to see 16, 17 and 18 year olds in Sixth and Seventh grade and the classrooms are often overcrowded. Students go to school for four hours per day and much of this time is wasted. Classes start late and a chunk of the day is spent copying straight from the board. For homework, I watch children copy pages straight from the book, tracing pictures and copying the Math problems, but not solving them. Teachers often pass students in order to move them along even though they are not prepared. They begin a school year behind and have a hard time catching up. Rather than going through the embarrassment of repeating a grade, students often choose to leave school all together.
Sometimes as I sit under my mosquito net, listening to rats crawl through my walls, or itching mosquito bites and I wonder "what I am doing here?". I could be back home with my family and friends in the states, celebrating holidays, going to bachelorette parties, watching my brother and his wife start a family etc. etc. But then little things happen, such as Cariño passing Seventh grade, and I realize it is the little things and the relationships I am making and that is what I am doing here.
Love you all and I will send another update soon enough! xoxo
